Sueno stared at the crisp white ceiling, lost in thought. What does the sky look like ?  She wondered. Was it dark blue just like Teddy? She grabbed onto Teddy tightly, the only thing of color in this dreadful place.

“Subject 883, it’s time for your tests,”

Ah, right. Sueno stared blankly at the scientist in the crisp white lab coat.

“Well, what are you waiting for brat? Come here…” The Man grumbled, dragging her by the sleeve across the crisp white tiles. Usually, she kicks and screams, flailing her arms about like the child she was.

But not anymore.

Because she was not a child anymore. She was only a tool with extraordinary powers, meant to serve and only serve, and so, Sueno pushed down any ugly, unnecessary emotions bubbling up to the surface, until they were all muffled and gone. Finally, emptiness filled Sueno’s heart, but it was peaceful. The emptiness didn’t beat her. Yes, she was a tool. She deserved this. It was her job to fulfil her purpose.

This had always been her life.

                                                                                      ***

After a grueling 6 hours, Sueno was back in her room, curled up in a corner like a rock. Today was especially hard. They had increased the voltage that passed through the helmet and wires attached to her body today, attempting to ‘make her stronger’ and ‘amplify her powers of summoning lightning’. Sighing, Sueno turned to stare at another pearly white wall, letting herself get lost in the emptiness of it. Slowly, she felt herself slipping. Slowly…

Slowly,

Slowly…

Slow..

“Ahhh!”

A bloodcurdling scream pulled her from deep inside herself and back to her room. She blinked. She grabbed her teddy, and blinked again.

“Ahhh! Help me, please! Let! Me! Go! You absolute raspberry-looking ugly man!”

Again, Sueno heard someone scream. She rubbed her eyes, confused. It wasn’t a dream. For the longest time, she had thought she was alone in this dreary place

“Silence! Subject 884. You must observe obedience or else…”

There were more screams followed by the sound of the once empty cell adjacent to her opening and promptly slamming shut.

Whoever is moving in must not be very bright. Sueno thought, chuckling to herself. I mean, ‘raspberry- looking ugly man’, really? She had never heard such enthusiastic cries among the generic monotone voices of the scientist droning on and on. It was a nice change of pace. Sueno’s smile faded.

Oh well, they’ll probably soon lose their shine to this colourless place anyway.

Sueno lay down in bed as the artificial sun flickered off and in the darkness, a selfish part of her was glad she wasn’t alone.

                                                                                                ***

“Hey, you lazy brat. Get up and come over here!”

Feeling oddly energetic, Sueno willingly walked over to the scientist and obediently waited for instructions. Maybe she was better adapting to her purpose as a tool?

“Tsk, what took you so long? Come here brat!” The crude scientist grumbled, using his rough calloused hands and dragging Sueno even though he didn’t have to this time.

“Hey! Leave her alone ugly raspberry!” A mousy, high-pitch voice rang in Sueno’s ears as she finally turned over to look at the cell.

There was a girl that seemed to be about at least a year younger than her. She was at most seven years old, and she had flaming red hair and soft green eyes. However, Sueno noticed that there was a fierceness in them as the girl shot the scientist a piercing glare.

It was strange, Sueno thought. It was peculiar how the tiny little thing held so much colour amidst the colourless surroundings. Sueno’s eyes widened as something within her squeezed her heart. The man raised a fist, aiming for the little girl, just as Sueno held onto his arm.

“Don’t touch her,” She murmured, looking at the man with a slight glare in her eyes.

“Feeling bold today, you emotionless little freak? Huh? Let me show you some real pain!”

Just then, Sueno felt a sharp stinging pain in her cheek, as her world started to spin fading into a white blur. Her head started ringing as she raised a trembling hand to her cheek. But it was ok; she would simply let the world fade, and the pain would disappear. That’s right-tools don’t feel pai-

“Hey…I’m sorry. It’s my fault… don’t…please don’t hurt her…” A trembling voice filled her ears. She looked up, finding the little girl squeezing the bars of her cell with a tear-streaked face. She was crying.

“Clark! What did I say about damaging the subjects? We need them in pristine condition!” Another lady wearing glasses with thick lenses chided and an argument ensued, allowing Sueno to slip away and approach the little girl.

“Hey, I just wanted to thank you for defending me earlier. Here, keep this teddy bear, he’s very nice, I promise,” Sueno said, holding out Teddy with a trembling hand.

“Are…are you sure?”

“Yeah, Teddy’s helped me all this while. Now, it’s his turn to help you. I’ll miss him but, you need it more than I do so.. Keep it,” Sueno replied gently pushing teddy into the little girl’s hands.

Eyes widening, the little girl stared at Teddy with excitement. She smiled brightly at Sueno.

“Thank you! Thank you so much! I’ll take good care of him,”

“I’m sure you will.”

“What? Are you kids conspiring against us? I swear these brats…”

Just then, the crude scientist came and picked Sueno with his arm, dragging her across the floor tiles.

“Hey, what’s your name?”

“Subject 88-”

“No! Not that! Your real name?”

Sueno stared at the girl blankly, but the smallest hint of a smile appeared in her eyes.  She opened her mouth to utter a name she hasn’t heard in years.

“Sueno. It’s Sueno,”

 As the red-haired girl slowly disappeared out of her sight as they travelled through the long hallways, Sueno felt the emptiness of the air where Teddy had once been. She smiled, a tiny one, that you might catch if you use a magnifying glass. The absence of Tteddy had filled a bit of her heart somehow.

I wonder how a little girl like her could speak up so fiercely.

“Stupid child,”

                                                                                               ***

Sueno wason a white hill, holding her mother’s hand. What were they doing? Right! They were going for a picnic! Sueno jumped up and down excitedly, unable to wait to sink her teeth into her favourite chicken and tomato sandwiches. She hummed happily, feeling the warmth of her mother’s hands and the cool breeze caressing her cheeks, as they slowly ascended the hill together. Just then, a gray butterfly flew past her.

“Look, mom! A butterfly! Aren’t they so fascinating and free?”

“Yes dear,” Her mom said gently. Sueno looked up to see her mom’s face covered in mist. “That one is such a pretty shade of pink.”

“Hah! That’s a good joke mom! What even is pink anyway?”

“Darling I’m not joking…” And Sueno heard her mom frowning, “I think they are such free and colorful creatures, just like you,”

“What are you talking about? Grey and white are the only colours we need! Aren’t they so comforting mama? They mean emptiness and emptiness doesn’t hurt! Right, mama?” Sueno said, looking at her mom expectantly.”

“But dear, didn’t you want to be an artist? You were born to dream, Sueno! Don’t keep those colours locked up inside you. I have a colour, the butterfly has a colour, and even this hill we stand on is such a pretty shade of green! We each have colours, and it’s not just white and grey… That’s what makes us beautiful,”

Sueno stared at the greyish grass, “I don’t know what you’re talking about,”

“You know exactly what I’m talking about,” she said quietly. “But it’s okay, you’ll see when you’re ready. I hope you’ll be able to spread your wings one day… and see them for what they are. So, stop hiding Sueno, and return to where you came from,”

“I don’t even have wings, and besides, I want to stay here with you, mama!”

Sueno felt a warm, loving touch on her cheek, and then she was engulfed by that warmth.

“I’m sorry Sueno, I’m sorry… I should have been able to protect you. It’s all my fault.”

Sueno wanted to open her mouth, to tell her that it wasn’t her fault. That it was okay, and she shouldn’t cry. This is all a bad dream. Yes, they were about to munch on some sandwiches soon…

The luminous globe of light in the dark blue sky flickered off, and everything went dark.

“Hey! Psst! Are you awake, Sueno?”

Sueno’s eyes flew open, staring at a red-haired little girl who was looming over her with her dark blue teddy in her face, staring at her with a mixture of curiosity and worry.

“…”

“Hello? Earth to Sueno?”

“…Yeah, I’m awake” Sueno turned to face the little girl, staring at her, before rubbing her eyes and staring at her again.

“Yep, I must still be dreaming,” Sueno mumbled, pulling the thin blanket over herself.

“Hey! I’m real, you know?”

“What? What are you doing here? How did you even get here?” Sueno scratched her head, sighing. “It’s been so chaotic since you’ve arrived. You know that, kid?”

“I’m not a kid!” She huffed, crossing her arms in indignance. “I’m eight!”

“…”

“…”

There was a pause as Sueno cupped her mouth shut, trying not to chuckle.

“I didn’t ask, but wow… honestly I’m surprised,”

“Thank you!” She scoffed proudly, looking the other girl up and down. “How old are you? Huh? Don’t you know you should be respectful to your elders?”

 “Guess,”

“4?”

“Nope! Times that by two and add two”

“eight…nine,” The little girl grumbled, counting on her fingers. “You’re TEN??” She exclaimed, eyes widening in surprise.

The smallest hint of a smirk snuck into Sueno’s face. “Yeah, you should respect your seniors, isn’t that right kid?”

The little girl’s face turned into the shade of her hair, and Sueno thought she looked like a strawberry.

“Hey! I’m not ‘kid’, you know… I have a name too!” She said grumbling.

Sueno hesitated, and then asked, “…What is it?”

“Guess,” she huffed.

“Is it strawberry?” She teased, but the girl’s green eyes widened as she whipped her head at lightning speed to look at Sueno, her mouth widening.

“How did you know? Are you psychic?”

“Wha- really?”

“Are you psychic??”

“No! I can control electricity, but that’s not important… It was just a lucky guess, I guess?”

“It’s such a weird name…”

“I think it’s cute. It suits you, Strawberry,”

Strawberry smiled, and Sueno felt her heart squeeze a little. “Thanks…”

They sat in silence for a bit. It was dark. The occasional shuffle from Strawberry was the only sound that filled Sueno’s ears. But for some reason, Sueno didn’t mind it at all. It was peaceful. Nothing could hurt them, for now. Sueno closed her eyes, humming a lullaby that her mom used to sing her. Without a word, Strawberry came up to her, dragging a pillow across the floor, muttering a good night as she promptly fell asleep. Slowly, Sueno felt her eyelids grow heavy.

And the world went dark.

                                                                                             ***

The luminous globe of light flickered on…and Sueno’s eyes fluttered open. With a yawn, Sueno threw the covers up, feeling a slight burst of energy. She hadn’t felt this way in a long time. She scanned the room, searching for a vibrant red fluff. But only the dark blue teddy stared at her.

“Ah… Strawberry?”

The girl was nowhere to be found.

A pearly white note peeked out of Teddy’s stomach. Sueno grabbed it hurriedly and opened it, taking in a deep breath.

“Hi, I had to go before the scientists woke up. I don’t wanna seem suspicious. Also, isn’t it weird how I wake up earlier than you but you’re older? I guess I’m just too good. You better step up your game, senior.

P.S. Surprisingly, you snore in your sleep

~ Strawberry”

Sueno stared at the note for a few moments before letting out a small chuckle. How childish. Sueno scorned. Sueno would never act like this. She wasn’t petty or childish. Sighing, she leant against the wall.

Well, at least the girl was safe.

Wait, what was she thinking? Sueno shook her head. She shouldn’t allow herself to think like this. She shouldn’t allow herself to think at all, for she was merely a tool. Besides, this place would get to the girl soon. She…was sure of it.

Sueno bit her lip.

Let’s not get too attached.

Sueno lay back on her bed, because today was her day off. Even tools shouldn’t be overused. She tried to press down the questions circling in her mind, but it was futile.

How did Sueno get in and out of my cell so easily? Did it have something to do with her powers? If so, what are her powers?

Sueno closed her eyes. There is no point in wondering about any of these.

After a while, Sueno drifted into a long sleep.

                                                                                            ***

“Sueno?”

Sueno was once again woken up by a certain strawberry-colored kid. Grumbling, she opened her eyes, a small hint of annoyance in them.

“…What?”

“Why are you always sleeping every time I visit you?” Strawberry teased, chuckling, but Sueno noticed something different. Her voice sounded…weak. Sueno sat up abruptly in bed, scanning the girl.

“Whoa. Whoa. I didn’t mean to ask you to get up that fast,” Strawberry murmured, scratching her head. Sueno noticed several cuts on her face, and a large purple bruise on her right hand.

“What…what happened?” Sueno asked in a slightly shaky voice.

“It’s fine…training was rough today, I guess. But it’s okay, I look more like a Strawberry now right?” She said, averting her eyes.

When Sueno stayed silent, Strawberry frantically tried to make excuses, smiling at Sueno like a fool. Sueno was wrong. Strawberry wasn’t childish, she was an idiot. And yet, she was much more mature than she was.

“Strawberry. Who are you trying to be strong for? Why are you fighting so hard to hide it? You’re a child. You should act like one.” Sueno took a deep breath. She was a hypocrite, but she couldn’t stop the words from spilling from her mouth. “If you want to cry, cry. If you feel angry, scream. If you feel it’s unfair, complain. Don’t just say ‘it’s fine,’ with a smile. Who do you think you’re fooling?” Sueno felt her voice crack, and a wave of emotions threatened to spill out. However, she promptly screwed the cap shut, looking at Strawberry with a blank face. Strawberry’s mouth was slightly open, and tears were spilling from her eyes. Maybe Sueno herself was the idiot.

Perhaps, they weren’t so different after all.

“But what about you..?” Sueno’s voice trembled. “You’re only slightly older than me…but You don’t act like a child at all.”

“Don’t learn from my example,” Sueno said calmly, “Because I’m a tool. And tools can’t act like kids. We don’t feel emotions.”

“But you are…a kid. Don’t you have dreams? Don’t you dream of getting out of here someday? Who are you to tell me what to do?” Sueno said, gritting her teeth. Tears continued to spill from her eyes as she clenched her fists.

“Tools don’t dream,”

“We’re not tools!” Strawberry screamed, shaking. She stared at Sueno, and Sueno stared back calmly. “Don’t you get sad?”

“I don’t”

“Don’t you get mad?”

“I don’t”

“Don’t…don’t you get scared?”

“I don’t”

“Stop lying to yourself!” Strawberry screamed, and Sueno flinched a bit. She wiped her tear-streaked cheeks with a trembling hand.

“You…you-“Strawberry took a deep breath, steadying herself. She moved closer to her and put a gentle hand over hers. “It hurt…right? You can cry.”

“…”

Just then, Strawberry moved her hand and started tickling Sueno. Taken aback, she started laughing and squealing.

“Pfft! Stop that!”

“Tools don’t laugh. You laughed, see? That must mean you’re human.”

“Pfft…I’m…I’m not…”

“And a tool wouldn’t have so kindly given me their Teddy,”

Sueno wanted to deny it. She was a hypocrite, and she only acted in her best interests. So…why?

 What was this heaviness she felt on her chest?

“Pfft…I’m not…Sniff” Sueno felt something burn in her eyes, and they spilt over slowly. Then all at once. They started mixing with her laughter, and slowly, the bottle cap over her emotions, opened slightly, but just enough.

The tears mixed with her laughter as Strawberry tickled her. And for the first time in months, Sueno cried.

                                                                                                 ***

Sueno stirred, her head feeling heavy and strangely clear at the same time. Rubbing her eyes, Sueno looked around.

Strawberry was nowhere to be found again.

Sighing, she picked up the note from Teddy, and gently opened it.

“Hey Sueno. I didn’t know you were such a crybaby lol. But it’s okay, I guess I am too. I just wanted to say…thanks. Thanks for reminding me that I’m a kid. I’ll try to feel my emotions as they are, so you should too! I’ll visit you later, so hang on a little longer. Don’t miss me too much!

P.S. We’re finding a way to escape out of this place I promise

~ Strawberry”

“Who does this brat think she is? She’s so full of herself” Sueno muttered, staring at the piece of paper in disbelief. She couldn’t help but let a small smirk creep onto her face. “She’s so annoying”

Sueno sighed, hugging Teddy close and staring at the ceiling. A word echoed in her brain.

Escape

“Naïve young fool,” Sueno muttered. There was no way of escape from this place. It was heavily guarded by scientists with various powerful devices, and located far from human society, in a place no one was aware of. How could she possibly think they could escape?

Unless…

Sueno shook her head. It was unwise to hold onto foolish hopes. It would only hurt more when they come crashing down in the long run. Sueno hugged her Teddy closer, tighter. For the first time in a long time, Sueno felt her stomach churn, and a pain in her chest that felt like her heart was getting ripped out. What was this feeling? Sueno tried to close her eyes, squirming. Usually, Sueno would have dismissed this as a childish fantasy…so why all of a sudden?

Why did it hurt to give up hope?

                                                                                              ***

“Su..Sueno…”

“Hmm?” Sueno stirred. She was so used to it that she didn’t even have to turn around to know who it was.

“Gosh…why are you always sleeping? You absolute sleepyhead.”

“I guess I just like sleeping,” Sueno hummed, closing her eyes. She hugged Teddy close to her chest.

“Why?”

Sueno hesitated.

“…Because it’s the only time I can dream,” Sueno mumbled.

“Tch! I thought tools couldn’t dream?”

“…”

“What? Cat got your tongue?”

“Where did you learn to be so rude?” Sueno grumbled, curling her fist into a ball. Seeing this, Strawberry backed off.

“Whoa. Whoa. I was just joking!” Strawberry said nervously, backing away. Sueno sighed.

“…Sleep is an exception. For that is a state of nothingness, and the emptiness can be filled with dreams. The state of sleep allows for things that don’t exist to come alive and hence, because it’s not real…that is the only time where tools such as myself can dream,” Sueno mumbled, a hint of a smile in her eyes.

“Those are some crazy complex mental gymnastics. Say…why do you want to dream anyway?” Strawberry asked, crossing her arms.

Sueno hesitated again.

“…Because my name means dream, and dreams are the only place I can escape this horrific nightmare,”

“Nightmare huh? I can agree with that. I don’t think we’ll ever be able to escape physically,” Strawberry said quietly, lying next to Sueno.

Sueno froze. These words caused a great pain in Sueno’s chest. Eyes wide, she took in a sharp breath.

“What did you say?” She asked, her voice trembling. Strawberry shrugged.

“I don’t think we’ll ever get out of here.”

And as if mocking her flickering heart and scorning at her flickering hopes, the luminous globe of light flickered off, plunging them into darkness. Sueno’s hands trembled slightly as she pulled at her hair. She had never heard Strawberry sound so…defeated. Slowly and reluctantly, Sueno turned to face her. Her blood ran cold.

Strawberry was much more bruised than before. One of her eyes was swollen, and her lip was bleeding. She stared at Sueno with a defeated expression. She wasn’t smiling.

“Strawberry…who did this to you?” Sueno asked through gritted teeth, reaching out a shaky hand as she cupped her face gently.

“It doesn’t matter. This is our reality now, and I guess there’s no way out,” Strawberry said simply, merely shrugging.

Sueno was shocked. She furrowed her brow, gritting her teeth.

“How…how could you give up so easily? This is not the Strawberry I know!” Sueno said, shaking Strawberry’s shoulders gently. “Listen, whatever they told you. It’s not real. We’re getting out of here. I promise.” Sueno said firmly. Just then, Sueno made a resolve to herself

“No, I think you were right…”

“No. No I was wrong,”

Strawberry looked at her through glistening eyes.

“I just really want to see the sky and the colors again,”  She sniffled.

Sueno paused, pursing her lips. She wanted to say the empty white and greys were comforting, but deep down she knew. She knew what we really wanted. She looked straight into Strawberry’s eyes.

“We’re getting out of here, I promise,” she said firmly, squeezing Teddy. Strawberry looked at her, then nodded slowly. Sueno smiled. It may feel like empty hope, but for now, that was enough.

Perhaps what she really needed to escape wasn’t this mental facility, but her own state of mind, for she needed to escape the dreams in her head to turn them into reality. Maybe, just maybe, she had finally escaped that mental prison.

She sighed.

Maybe she was ready to escape the comforting embrace of the emptiness,  and face the harsh chaotic colors of the outside world.

“When?”

“Tomorrow,”

                                                                                                 ***